Current juniors are probably aware of the basic checklist of things they’ll want for college applications this fall: transcript, essay, test scores, activity list, and supplemental question responses. But there’s one document that is mostly out of your control—a letter of recommendation. You’ll probably need one (or two, or three), and right now is the best time to think about who to ask for recommendations, how to ask them, and when to ask them. Here is a an updated rundown on rec letters and how to get the best ones you can.

Understand what you’re asking for. Have you ever seen a letter of recommendation? Have you ever written one? Do you really understand what you’re asking for? Take some time to get familiar with the type of letter you’re asking for. Look at these examples with comments. You’ll have a better idea of who to ask, when to ask, and how to ask if you have a better appreciation for what all goes into a good recommendation.

Write one for yourself. Seriously. Put yourself into the mind of the teacher you want a letter from, and try to write your very best letter about you as if you were that teacher. Think about what qualities that teacher would say stand out, and think of narratives and examples that teacher could give about you. Do not try to send it as if they wrote it! That’s not what this is for. Nobody will see the letter you write, but it’s a great exercise. Self knowledge is the best knowledge, and few things help you know yourself like having to explain yourself.

Make sure you ask someone who can help you. Like the essays and interviews, recommendation letters are one of your opportunities to show colleges that you’re an interesting person, not just a transcript. So make sure you ask for recommendation letters from teachers who know you as a person. Some schools specify which teachers they want letters from, and there’s nothing you can do about that. But when you have control, get teachers who will say great things about you. If a teacher is likely to just repeat what’s already in your transcript, then you’ve lost a big opportunity. If a teacher is writing letters for a lot of other students, then that teacher may not be able to write a unique and personal letter for you. A teacher who had you for a class and also sponsored an activity you were involved with is ideal. A teacher you’ve had good rapport with and who knows you as a person is going to be better for you than a teacher who doesn’t know you as well but gave you higher grades.

Understand that it’s a personal favor. Teachers are not required to write recommendation letters, and they’re certainly not required to write good ones, so treat it as a favor. When I was a teacher, I liked it when students set up an appointment with me to come and talk to me about rec letters. I preferred to know why they were coming so I could prepare questions or suggestions. I loved it when a student sent me an email asking to come by later and ask for a rec letter. However, I also worked with teachers who didn’t care for this approach. They feel like it makes them have the same conversation multiple times. So there’s no one best approach.

But whatever you do, ask for the letter politely and with lots of time to spare. Don’t rush the teacher or treat it like a foregone conclusion that they’ll write you one. And never corner a teacher while they’re trying to get someplace else.

Give them some direction. Hopefully you’ve given a lot of thought to what personal traits you want to discuss in your application essays. Let the teachers who you’re asking for recommendations know what those traits are. If there’s a particular story or example you’re hoping they’ll write about, let them know. Teachers may or may not follow up on that, but it can’t hurt to ask. Which do you think will get a better rec letter?

·      “Mr. Holloway, can you write me a letter of recommendation?”

Or

·      “Mr. Holloway, I’m putting together my college applications, and I’m really trying to emphasize my creative problem solving. Would it be possible for you to write me a letter of recommendation? I was remembering the time in class when the computer crashed in the middle of my Power Point presentation and I still found a way to get the information across without it.”

Unless the teacher asks for it, I don’t think you should give them a copy of your transcript, résumé, or “brag sheet.” It makes it too easy for the teacher to write about what’s already in your application. Instead, offer to send the teacher any information or reminders they need. Even better, offer to show the the letter you wrote for yourself. It’s a common practice in business to have people write their own recommendations to be edited and sent off. Show the person you’re asking a letter from how confident you are and what you need by offering your letter. However, don’t offer to write the first draft yourself unless you already have it written.

Convey the actual deadline for the letter. If you’re applying for Early Action, Early Decision, or any other November 1 deadline, let them know. If it’s a Regular Decision application due in early January, let them know. If it’s rolling admissions, and the sooner you get all the materials in the sooner you get a decision, let them know. If it’s a Regular Decision application due in early January, but you want to have all your applications out early for your peace of mind, that’s fine. But the teacher’s deadline is still early January. Don’t try to push them into arbitrary or confusing deadlines that aren’t realistic.

If they say no, don’t be pushy. This should go without saying. There are a number of reasons a teacher might say no when you ask for a recommendation. Don’t assume you know what the reason is, and don’t be pushy. Someone who can’t or doesn’t want to write a letter isn’t going to write a good one. If the teacher who says no is one who a college requires a letter from, let that teacher know and see if there’s something you can work out. But do this as a follow-up, not in the same conversation where the teacher initially says no.

Say thank you. A recommendation letter is a personal favor, so make sure you thank the teacher profusely. Thank the teacher when they agree to write the letter. Say thank you again—in writing—when the teacher sends the letter. When you get accepted to any school that the teacher recommended you for, say thank you again. A thank-you gift is not required, but is a nice gesture. But don’t give one until after the letter has been sent—you don’t want it to look like a bribe. 

How many rec letters will you need? And from who? This is tough to answer, because each college has its own requirements. As you’re looking at colleges you may want to apply to, look through their admission requirements to get a sense of what you need. Some colleges don’t require any recommendations. It’s very common for a college to want one from your school counselor and one from a teacher. Some require two teacher recommendations, and some specify that one be from a STEM teacher and one from a Humanities teacher. Most will take letters from community members other than teachers and counselors.

I think it’s best to plan on getting recommendations from your counselor and two teachers until you know for sure you don’t need that many. You should obviously send all the recommendations a school requires. But I don’t think you should send more than a single extra recommendation, even if they allow for more. Sending too many recommendations quickly becomes a problem: it makes you seem more annoying and desperate than accomplished and interesting. Also avoid having someone impressive send a recommendation if they don’t actually know you. A bland, generic letter from a business executive, elected official, or famous person doesn’t actually help you.

When should you ask for rec letters? This is also tough to answer, because each teacher has their own preferences. There are teachers who, if approached in the spring of 11th grade, will tell you it’s way too early to deal with that. There are teachers who, if approached in the fall of 12th grade, will tell you it’s too late and they can’t take on any more. Some teachers would love to discuss it during the summer when the pace is slower, but some will absolutely resent you for bothering them in the summer. So all that I can advise is to bring it up before the end of this school year, but bring it up casually. Ask your teachers what they prefer, and then follow up when appropriate.

What do you do if a college asks for something you can’t provide? There are times when a college may ask for a recommendation that you’re simply unable to provide. Example: your school counselor left the school and hasn’t been replaced. Whenever there’s any kind of problem or question, reach out to your admission representative at the college. Most colleges still divide their admission staff by geography, and most will let you look up who the admission counselor for your region is. If you can find that on their admission web page, perfect. If not, find any contact info you can for the admissions office and reach out with your question. The sooner you do this, the better. Don’t wait until right before the deadline to let them know you may not be able to get exactly what they’re asking for. Consider mid-September to be your deadline for this (unless, of course, you decide to apply to a school after that).

I’m sure there are many exceptions to my normal advice for rec letters, but here are two big ones. If you’re applying to a US service academy, then you will be required to get a recommendation from your member of Congress. Representatives typically have a form on their website with instructions. If you’re applying to any of these, ignore what I said about getting recommendations from impressive people you don’t necessarily know. Also, home schooled students will often have a completely different set of requirements, since recommendations can be awkward if your teachers and counselors are also your parents. Most colleges have a separate checklist easy to find on their admission web pages.

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2. Read these related posts:

   Do you need a “brag sheet”?

   On swastikas and rec letters

   Be kind to your counselor

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